Its a Good Place...
by Kurt Epps—The PubScout June 17, 2022
As a veteran of thirty-seven years in an English classroom, certain things still leap out at me. Spelling errors, like that annoying your-you’re, there-they’re-their and the it’s-its dilemmas. That particular error is both evident and intentional in the title.
To make sense, the apostrophe is needed in “it’s,” because the apostrophe makes it “it is.”
But that apostrophe made no sense to me when I saw the billboard in Shallotte near where the old Grillin’ Crab used to sit. It read COMING SOON—SMOKE’D.
Huh? What the heck did that mean? Was the person who did the graphic design just sloppy and dropped a glob of paint? Or worse, perhaps illiterate?
Or could it be Smoke would? As in the response to “who would make your evening dinner worthwhile?" Smoke’d.
Whatever. The missus and I decided to give Smoke’d a try. We were seated quickly in a great corner spot overlooking the mighty Shallotte River and the marsh, as a beautiful breeze was wafting through. Our server Kylie assured us that if that breeze was carrying raindrops, they had the ability to close the windows.
Smoke’d’s ( now THAT looks awkward! ) menu is the product of Head Chef Vernon Groves, who made his bones at his Grandma Lillian’s elbow and various places—including Wing and Fish right next door—before assuming command of Smoke’d.
“I’m about really good food. Always have been. When I was young, my family rarely went out to eat, because the best food was always right at our own table,” said the veteran chef.
And Groves, whose favorite personal dish is something called “Briskets and Gravy,” applies that principle to his dishes at Smoke’d. Owner Barrett McMullan gives Groves all the leeway he wants, which accounts for why Groves loves his boss. And why the Smoke'd menu is not five pages long.
And speaking of love, Manager Stephanie (who could shed no light on the mysterious apostrophe), drives every day from Loris. When I commented that that was quite a distance, she responded, “I love where I work.” And Kylie, our bubbly, efficient server, reflected that same enthusiasm and satisfaction. That's Smiley Kylie, left.
And speaking of satisfaction, our food was quite good. Having been advised by my bartender in OIB, I had the Half Rack of Still House Ribs with Fries, Slaw and Smoked—er, Smoke’d— Macaroni. The missus opted for the Smoke’d Shrimpburger. Six housemade BBQ sauces are available as are four appetizers and salads.
There is seafood available, like the salmon special that was on during our visit, or the Smoke'd Shrimpburger the Missus ordered. But look for even more seafood in the future as Vernon gets out his fishing pole. Black Bass, Mullett and Mahi, beware.
There's a decent variety of beers on the beer list, compiled by a GM named Brett Drinker. (Can we say ironic?) But the beer that went well with my ribs was a 6.4% offering from Southern Pines called Man of Law.
Unless it’s a special occasion like a birthday or anniversary, we usually eschew dessert, but Stephanie piqued the Missus’ interest by mentioning a dessert called “Apple Cobbler with Maple/Pecan Cinnamon Ice Cream, made especially for Smoke’d by Spilt Milk in OIB.
I would have taken a picture of it, but it disappeared rather quickly.
We will chew, not eschew, that dessert in the future and so should you. As Soupy Sales used to say, “It’s so good, your brains will fall out.” So what if it adds a few calories? Life is not a dress rehearsal.
